... and I start again!

I'm now 24 hours into my third decade. Odd to think of it that way I suppose, but it gives me the impression of a fresh start or the ability to create one. I know a lot of people make New Year's resolutions and I have tried in the past, but I can't think of any one in particular that has lasted a substantial period of time, much less a year. My reasoning behind this phenomenon (I'm sure it's not limited to my own personal experience) is that while a changing year is a rather tangible signal of the passing of time (i.e. you actually have to think about what date to write on the top of a form), it has little personal connection or meaning. So often the resolutions function simply as conversation starters in the same manner that the question, "so what are you giving up for Lent?" functions in March. Today I decided that instead of New Year's resolutions, I would manufacture a list of goals for my 21st year. I know that all of them are possible but I need to prove to myself that I possess the skills necessary to complete them. I want to see that I can create a product.

Therefore, between now and my 21st birthday I will:
perform a solo recital
sell a dozen handmade books on consignment in Kennett
sell at least one greeting card verse
be published in print
travel at least once outside North America
take an audition for something other than a summer festival


The list will be updated as needed. I thought I had more things in mind today, but I can't think of them now. I will.

On a completely different topic. I've noticed this break that I am back to what I consider my normal cheerful, almost happy-go-lucky self and I feel so fortunate to have the friends that I do and to know the people I am the closest to. If I trust you with my time, I count you in a small circle of friends who have truly left an imprint in my heart. I also noticed that I feel very 'settled.' I don't know how else to describe it other than by saying settled because it is more like the absence of searching than anything else. It feels good. I am in a good place and I know that everything happens for a reason (even though the reason may be very hard to see at times... like when facing the debit of 80x too much money from my checking account for a wire transfer that fortunately did not work!)

Bonne nuit!